I think I am going to consider making the front porch my new blogging spot. It’s another beautiful night. The house was stifling hot, even with the fans turned on, so here I am. I think that one of my favorite things in the world is breezes. Cooling, cleansing, and calming, I can feel either totally refreshed or totally at peace by them. Tonight I feel at peace. All day I feel like I have had this inner struggle of wanting to break free. I know that it’s not my time yet. I want to go somewhere where nobody knows my name, new beginnings, and fresh starts. I want to go to a place that I can call my own. Something that is mine, and I have the choice to open the door and let the world in, or to close it and shut it out.
Tonight if I had that option, to keep the door open or to shut it, I think I would have it open. I am not so lost in my thoughts that I can’t step out of them, and the company would be good. To share a glass of iced sun tea and to discuss life philosophies sounds like a very nice way to pass an evening. Not talking would be an option too. Sometimes it is just nice to sit in a companionable silence, where not every thought has to be shared, and yet having that sense that you are not alone in the world. It’s a rather lovely thought.
I can hear the tinkling of wind chimes. It feels like ages since I have heard that. I wonder what else I would hear if I closed my eyes and just listened. I can hear the sounds of the car going into the center of town; I can hear the wind chimes on the neighbor’s back porch. I can hear the wind rustling the leaves in the trees. I look up; there are no stars in the sky tonight. The clouds look like a faded pinkish purple against the blue of the sky. It’s almost like God decided to tie dye the sky. The clouds look like perfect pieces of swirly cotton as they move ever so slowly across the sky.
There it is again, that night breeze. It’s almost addicting. What I wouldn’t give right now for a tent and a sleeping bag. I would not go back in that house at all. I would stay out here all night. I would say up until that faded blue sky turned into a misty grey dawn. I would take a deep breath and inhale the sweet damp morning air, and know that truly each day is its own, and can only be what I make of it.